Volume One: The Soul-Gathering Gourd and the Soul-Igniting Lamp Chapter 44: Spoils of War

Page 1 of 3

The moon shone bright and clear, the wind was high and the clouds thin. The fresh scent of grass and trees filled the air, and beneath the stars and moon, Gu Mo walked—completely naked...

Bah!

Gu Mo was not completely naked; at the very least, the striking King Yama’s bellyband on his chest was impossible to overlook.

With a face as dark as iron, Gu Mo grew more and more uneasy as he walked.

“What is this bellyband made of anyway? All my clothes were reduced to ashes, but this damned thing is perfectly fine?”

No sooner had he spoken than Gu Mo yawned, utterly exhausted. Since he’d returned to the town, he’d only managed one good, lazy sleep. Every day, he encountered different monsters and evil spirits. He truly had no idea what was going on!

Though his bare feet ached from the rough ground, Gu Mo had no choice but to press on, resigned.

His phone?

That had once sat serenely in his pocket. At least he wasn’t carrying the key to the incense shop. Now, Gu Mo wore nothing but a bellyband as he wandered through the mountains and forests. Yet the gentle breeze still played between his legs, a sensation difficult to put into words.

Unconsciously, Gu Mo heard the rushing sound of a waterfall. At this, he couldn’t help but smile to himself. The Temple of the Mountain God to the east wasn’t far from the Azure Ripple Pool. Once he reached the pool, it would be another half-hour’s walk to the incense shop.

Though this area was scarcely populated, at least he could finally replenish himself with water.

With this thought, he quickened his pace...

Time slipped by.

Having quenched his thirst, Gu Mo finally caught sight of the long-missed street, but a new problem arose!

On the street’s utility poles, pairs of vigilant surveillance cameras were anything but decorative!

If Gu Mo, clad only in a bellyband, were caught on camera—or worse, spotted by a sanitation worker emptying the bins—he’d be tomorrow’s headline for sure!

With that in mind, Gu Mo began searching frantically for anything to cover himself.

Ah, humanity—

Sometimes, when misfortune strikes, even drinking cold water can crack a tooth, and a fart can break your heel!

The street was utterly bare, not even a plastic bag or a cardboard box in sight.

Regretting his choices to the core, Gu Mo could only cover his handsome face with his hands and stride quickly towards the incense shop.

The reason was simple: everyone looks more or less the same when naked, but faces are the giveaway. So, in times of crisis, covering one’s face was the most important thing!

In a few quick breaths, Gu Mo, clad in his bizarre bellyband, spotted the incense shop’s half-open door.

Seeing salvation at last, he broke into a run, swinging his legs with all his might.

As his footsteps drew closer, a familiar, lascivious laugh drifted from inside the incense shop.

“Hahaha! Lord Yama, your wishes truly have been fulfilled. I never thought Brother Gu would frighten so easily!”

Then, a silvery, bashful laugh rang out, piquing Gu Mo’s curiosity outside the door.

“What? Their wish fulfilled? Are these two idiots talking about me?”

Gu Mo, who’d been mortified just moments before, now held his breath and crouched beside a nearby trash can.

Since both people inside were stronger than him, getting too close would mean being discovered for sure.

If that happened, there’d be no way to uncover any secrets.

The smell was unpleasant, true, but better than being kept in the dark!

He glanced around, then perked up his ears to listen...

“Daoist Master Xiao, you said Brother Gu was so frightened he lost his soul, and even married you in a heaven-and-earth ceremony? But why isn’t he here yet?”

Hearing this, Gu Mo found himself warming to this sly Daoist priest, Tu Sheng.

After all, they hadn’t known each other long.

Yet Xiao Yulou, the sly Daoist, treated him like a brother, always thinking on Gu Mo’s behalf.

In times of danger, this immortal, ethereal Daoist would step forward without hesitation.

For these reasons alone, Gu Mo regarded Xiao Yulou with newfound respect and was eager to befriend him.

But curiosity got the better of him, and he listened intently to the conversation.

“Master Xiao, my husband must have run into trouble. After all, that was a heavenly ‘Nine Yin Purple Thunder.’ An ordinary person couldn’t possibly survive it unscathed.”

“Hahaha! Rest assured, Lord Yama. Before I left, I made a calculation. Brother Gu will surely turn misfortune into blessing...”

With a hearty laugh, Xiao Yulou continued, “That’s why I left on purpose. Otherwise, how could you and Brother Gu become husband and wife?”

Another silvery laugh rang out from inside the incense shop.

Page 2 of 3

Not far away, Gu Mo was cursing himself for being duped.

Damn! That damned, scheming Daoist—just moments ago, I was practically worshipping him. Who would have thought he’d been plotting against me all along!

And that silly girl really kept her composure! All those earlier tears and grievances, all just an act!

If there’s anyone the Oscars are missing, it’s this silly girl!

Who would have guessed? Those two blockheads actually teamed up to trick me—unbelievable! But...

Now that it had come to this, Gu Mo, crouched in the darkness, began to weigh the pros and cons.

Landing a beautiful wife for free wasn’t such a bad thing.

And with King Yama as his backer, even the Black and White Impermanence wouldn’t dare make trouble for him!

Given his current streak of bad luck, having powerful allies was the wisest choice.

After a moment’s reflection, Gu Mo let go of his grievances.

Just then, footsteps echoed from the corridor.

At this, Gu Mo’s heart tightened, and he coughed twice before dashing into the incense shop.

Creak—thud!

As he shut the door, Gu Mo peered through the crack, completely forgetting he was nearly naked.

The two inside, who’d been cheerfully chatting, were struck dumb by the sudden spectacle!

Their frozen smiles and the awkward atmosphere instantly spread...

“Br—Brother Gu!”

The sly Daoist Xiao Yulou’s facial muscles twitched as he awkwardly whispered.

Coming to his senses, Gu Mo quickly grabbed a black bundle and a pocket to cover his modesty.

Then, sweating profusely, he turned around with a helpless grin.

“Heh heh heh!”

Seeing this, Xiao Yulou slipped a hand into his sleeve and, in the blink of an eye, tossed a yellow Daoist robe to Gu Mo, who caught it and put it on with one hand.

“Husband, what happened to you...?”

With a sigh, Gu Mo walked to the counter and recounted everything that had happened.

As he finished, Xiao Yulou looked curiously at the pocket Gu Mo had brought back.

“Brother Gu, to escape such calamity is a sign of future fortune. But what’s that smell coming from the bag?”

At this, Gu Mo’s heart skipped a beat, and he immediately spread the spoils across the counter.

Inside was a transparent soda bottle filled with thick, dark red, mysterious blood.

The gold bars in the bag seemed dull and lackluster.

The blood inside the bottle hadn’t coagulated, which was strange enough, and with Xiao Yulou’s worried expression, Gu Mo felt even more uneasy.

“Brother Xiao, what kind of blood is this?”

Xiao Yulou furrowed his brow and examined it closely, then formed a Daoist hand sign and exclaimed.

“Boundless Heaven’s Venerable!”

He sighed under the couple’s watchful gaze.

“This is snake blood!”

Gu Mo scoffed in disdain.

“Tch—so it’s just snake blood! If it were pig’s blood, at least I could use it for hotpot. What am I supposed to do with this?”

At this, Xiao Yulou contorted his features and cast Gu Mo a fierce glare.

“Blockhead—utter blockhead!”

Without waiting for Gu Mo’s retort, the eccentric Daoist seized the bottle and gave it a sharp shake.

Instantly, the snake blood formed a shallow whirlpool, and within the deep crimson, like golden sand in a perfume bottle, strange yet dazzling specks of light shimmered.

Stunned by the extraordinary sight, Gu Mo and his wife tilted their heads, transfixed.

Xiao Yulou cleared his throat to bring them back to reality.

“Ahem—”

Gu Mo, still frowning, earnestly sought guidance.

“Brother Xiao, why does this snake blood glow?”

Page 3 of 3

With a satisfied smirk, Xiao Yulou replied with a touch of mischief:

“In the northern seas, there is a fish, called Kun. The Kun is so large, it cannot be stewed in a single pot...”

At this nonsensical remark, the couple’s faces turned ashen as they stared at the sly Daoist.

Xiao Yulou spat to the side three times.

“Pah! Pah! Pah!”

Then, regaining his composure, he spoke seriously.

“Brother Gu, have you ever heard the saying, ‘A snake grows into a python, a python grows into a flood dragon, a flood dragon grows into a dragon’?”

The couple shook their heads in unison.

Seeing this, Xiao Yulou sighed at their perfect synchrony and naivety.

“This snake blood is no ordinary thing! If I’m not mistaken, this blood comes from a flood dragon!”

At this, Gu Mo gasped.

“What? Flood dragon’s blood? Brother Xiao, you’re not tricking me, are you?”

Xiao Yulou widened his eyes as big as eggs and raised his voice.

“I’m a Daoist, even if I took a ten-thousand-step retreat, I would not deceive you!”

Gu Mo was still full of doubt.

“So what’s with that white-furred fox spirit? Why give me a bottle of flood dragon blood for no reason?”

Xiao Yulou only offered a mysterious smile. After keeping them in suspense, he continued.

“Brother Gu, did you not find a letter beneath the gold bars?”

At this, Gu Mo suddenly realized and picked up the note beneath the gold bars.

There were several small black paw prints, and beneath them, a crooked scrawl.

But remembering the handwriting belonged to the fox spirit, Gu Mo let it go.

“Little one, the secrets of heaven must not be revealed. But I, your immortal, love to defy fate!

By the time you read this letter, I will have left North Wasteland Town.

The reason is simple—my arch-nemesis, Liu Kunsheng, has emerged from seclusion, restless and itching for action. Though that fool truly is a simpleton!

This bottle of blood was bought at the cost of my dear friend Hui Guangji’s life. His golden body is buried beneath a pine tree in Liberation Park. I must trouble you to give him a proper burial.

The remaining eight gold bars are payment, nothing more. I simply want to see Liu Kunsheng die at Azure Ripple Pool!

All you need do is go to the eastern Azure Ripple Pool at midnight on Friday, and all will be revealed.

Thank you!

Signed with respect by the Immortal, Huang Jinguizishang.”

After reading the letter, Gu Mo’s face darkened with worry. King Yama’s wife, Jiang Jingxue, placed her hand on his and gently asked,

“Husband... husband, what’s wrong?”

Gu Mo forced a bitter smile and shook his head. Just as he looked up, he caught sight of Jiang Jingxue’s peerless beauty. In that instant, all his troubles melted away.

“It’s just... I simply don’t understand what that white-furred fox spirit is after.”

At this, Xiao Yulou swiftly formed a Daoist hand sign and declared,

“Boundless Heaven’s Venerable!”

As both Gu Mo and his wife looked toward the corpse, Xiao Yulou smiled faintly.

“Brother Gu, that fox spirit wants you to avenge his brother’s death.”

Gu Mo’s face instantly clouded.

“What... me? I’m just an ordinary incense shop owner—how could I possibly defeat a flood dragon?”

Xiao Yulou gave a knowing smile, as if he’d anticipated the question.

“How could you be ordinary, Brother Gu? You were born...”

But before he could finish, Gu Mo waved him off.

“Enough already! Not this again. If you’re not tired of it, the audience surely is! My ears have calluses from your clichés!”

Gu Mo frowned and added,

“Are you about to say I, Gu Mo, was born with a ‘Supreme Yin Fate,’ married King Yama, and am anything but ordinary?”

Xiao Yulou’s eyes gleamed knowingly, and Gu Mo could already guess what he was up to. After all, Gu Mo himself was no stranger to mischief.

“Brother Gu, are you familiar with the Five Immortals?”

...