Chapter 37: Zhang Kai, Master of On-the-Spot Acting

"What nonsense are you spouting, kid? What does any of this have to do with me? If I could really know someone that powerful, why would I bother bringing you along? Wouldn't it be better just to come and collect things myself?" The old fortune-teller retorted irritably.

Zhang Kai looked puzzled. "Is that Ultraman really that powerful?"

The old fortune-teller rolled his eyes. If he can fly, how could he not be?

Yet the youth from the Bone Gate remained silent.

There was truth in those words.

That Ultraman—well, let's call him Ultraman for convenience—was indeed terrifying.

In this era of dwindling spiritual power, the best among them had only just established their foundation; the less fortunate hadn't even entered the gates. Yet that stranger had gone straight to soaring through the skies.

This Ultraman was undoubtedly problematic.

At that moment, someone else emerged.

It was the twin-tailed girl.

One of her braids had come undone, her cheeks flushed, looking a bit disheveled, but she still held a lollipop between her lips.

Her fixation on that lollipop made Zhang Kai wonder what it would be like to taste something so soaked.

Upon stepping out, she glanced at Zhang Kai, then glared at the old fortune-teller.

"Wudang sect, I've remembered you," she said coldly.

The old fortune-teller sneered. "Treasures belong to those with virtue. You lack both virtue and ability, yet you have the nerve to blame me?"

She said nothing, turned sharply, and swiftly left.

Zhang Kai couldn't help asking, "What's going on? Are you fighting over the loot? Wasn't everything already divided?"

The old fortune-teller shot him a glance. "And you believe what they say?"

Zhang Kai feigned confusion. "Was it all nonsense then?"

"More than nonsense—it's sheer rubbish. All that talk about treasures and whatnot, even if there were any, when the mountain god fled calamity, he'd have used them up. What could possibly be left? Everyone who comes here is after the mountain god's divine body—now that's the real treasure. Even a single strand would be endlessly beneficial," the old fortune-teller mocked.

Zhang Kai looked genuinely shocked. "That's outrageous! What happened to basic trust between people?"

The old fortune-teller regarded him with a half-smile. "Kid, you may be self-taught, but you don't know the true nature of those who inherit the path. I didn't mention it before because I wanted you to experience it first-hand. Now you should understand: the road of cultivation is one that defies the heavens. For the sake of their own power, cultivators will stop at nothing. The principle is: better my friend dies than me. So, whenever you meet a cultivator, your first instinct should be not to believe them."

Zhang Kai looked at him seriously. "What about you?"

The old fortune-teller grinned. "I'm reliable."

Pah!

Zhang Kai scoffed inwardly, then nodded. "True enough. After all, I've known you the longest, and you seem decent."

"Hey, not bad—you learn quickly," the old fortune-teller praised.

Zhang Kai smiled. "I'm being sincere—straight from the heart."

The old fortune-teller said, "Keep that attitude, and you'll make it in this circle. Now, let's get going. This place is spent; lingering here does no good."

Zhang Kai was confused. "How is it spent? Didn't we come away empty-handed?"

The old fortune-teller replied, "The divine body was snatched by Ultraman. The remaining items are guarded by vicious poisonous creatures—risking it isn't worthwhile. Most importantly, Zhang Kai, haven't you felt something amiss?"

"Amiss? What could be wrong? I feel fine," Zhang Kai replied, feigning ignorance.

The old fortune-teller said, "Where gods are buried, there is always divine resentment."

"What is divine resentment?"

"A curse—a curse from the gods."

"What? There's a curse?" Zhang Kai shrieked, his cries echoing.

...

Leaving the tomb, once again seeing the starry sky, the old fortune-teller breathed a sigh of relief.

"Still alive—how wonderful."

"Heh, this was just an ordinary forbidden place, and not even a large-scale one. There weren't any deadly traps, and you were scared?" the Bone Gate youth mocked.

The old fortune-teller glanced at him. "Enough talk. You collected plenty of those exotic snake skulls—remember, I get a share."

The Bone Gate youth replied, "You won't be shorted, but with this, Bone Gate's debt to Wudang is settled. If we cooperate again, it won't be so easy."

The old fortune-teller scoffed. "Get real. Bone Gate, infamous as the enemy of all spirits, only Wudang would take you in. What other cultivator would treat you so sincerely? If you have the guts, don't come begging me next time."

The Bone Gate youth couldn't be bothered to argue and turned to leave.

The old fortune-teller ignored him, instead looking at Zhang Kai, who was still pretending to be clueless.

"Kid, stop daydreaming. Divine curses sound scary, but they're not as terrible as they seem. There are ways to deal with them."

Zhang Kai snapped back, grabbing the old fortune-teller, and asked excitedly, "How do I deal with it?"

"There are plenty of methods," the old fortune-teller replied. "If your cultivation is strong enough, you can summon heavenly lightning to strike yourself—thunder is pure and masculine, capable of erasing curses. If you can cultivate the Red Lotus Karma Fire, that's even better—karma fire shields you, evil can't invade, and forbidden lands become your backyard. Or if your virtue is boundless, curses and resentment can't touch you. Of course, the simplest method is incense purification. Wudang has accumulated some over the years; if you're willing to join as an external disciple, I can help you cleanse the curse."

Zhang Kai blinked. "So, the key is joining Wudang and becoming your errand boy?"

The old fortune-teller laughed. "What nonsense! I'm cherishing talent. Although you're from the Maoshan lineage, all Daoist sects are one family. Wudang doesn't mind disciples with prior training."

"I want to try other methods first," Zhang Kai replied.

The old fortune-teller shrugged. "Suit yourself, but let me warn you: the sooner you deal with a curse, the better. It's insidious—right now it may not seem to matter, but if your luck turns, it will aggravate your tribulations. Normally, a stumble might just hurt a bit, but with a divine curse, you could get run over by a truck, stabbed by sharp objects, or infected with something nasty."

Zhang Kai: "..."

"Haha, I'm just saying. Think it over. Let's leave now; I'm getting old and can't take much more. I'm heading back to Wudang, where the young ladies can soothe my weary body," the old fortune-teller said, swinging his long sleeves and strolling away leisurely.

Zhang Kai bared his teeth.

Old man—your mouth is vicious.

But you think you'll get a free lackey to risk his life for you? Dream on.

Now that he knew how to dispel the curse, he could rid himself of danger in no time.

He was about to follow when a few more people emerged.

This time, it was Gu Mingyu, three fully armed subordinates, Chongming Daoist, and his puppet disciple.

Seeing them, Zhang Kai feigned caution and stepped back.

Gu Mingyu noticed his reaction, paused to consider, then spoke. "Daoist Zhang, although I tricked you in some ways, rest assured, I mean you no harm."

Zhang Kai kept a straight face, though a phrase came to mind.

"I may have slept with someone else, but I truly love you. Bah, what a scoundrel."

"I want to know—is Gu Mingyu your real name?" Zhang Kai asked.

Gu Mingyu replied, "No, my online name is my real name."

Zhang Kai was stunned.

Was there really someone surnamed Lucky Carp in this world?

Lucky Carp? Carp?

Li Xiaoxian?

"I know you'll doubt anything I say now, but the road ahead is long. If we meet again, I'll prove my sincerity."

"Daoist Zhang, I hope we can cooperate again in the future," Chongming Daoist said with a gentle smile.

He hadn't used any of the protective and warding talismans he'd gotten from Zhang Kai.

So, he hadn't left empty-handed after all.

Zhang Kai rolled his eyes, tempted to ask for his talismans back.

But after thinking it over, he let it go.

Consider it a favor.

Who knows, maybe they'd explore together again someday.