Chapter 38: Little Black's Dark Past—The Time He Stole the Big Joker from the Landlord's Game

Underworld Card Games: From Fight the Landlord to Six-Chong
Volume 2, Chapter 38: Xiao Hei’s "Dark History": That Time He Stole the "Big King"

Old Zhou squatted on the ground, stuffing the last of the sunflower seed shells into his blue cloth bag. Just as he tied the knot, he heard Wang Er-Ma clear his throat. "Since we haven't found it with Old Zhou, let's think—Xiao Hei, did you help King Yama hide the 'Big King' from the Fight the Landlord deck last time? And then hid it in your own hat and forgot to take it out?"

The moment these words were out, everyone’s gaze fixed on Xiao Hei. Xiao Hei was nearby, helping the Judge pick up abacus beads; at this, his hand froze. A bead clattered to the floor and rolled to Xiao Bai’s feet. He stood up quickly, his hand instinctively touching his black cloth cap—the last time he helped King Yama hide the Big King, he had shoved it into this very hat. He’d forgotten it, and when the Queen of Yama searched him and found it, he was sentenced to three days of shuffling cards. Every ghost in the Underworld knew this; it was his "dark history."

"I-I only hid it because the King asked me to! I didn't steal it!" Xiao Hei’s face flushed a deep, dusky shade as he scrambled to defend himself. "And it was Xiao Bai who told me to hide it! He said if the King lost, he’d punish us both by making us sweep the Naihe Bridge!"

"You’re lying!" Xiao Bai jumped up immediately, pointing at Xiao Hei’s nose. "It was clearly you who wanted to drink Meng Po’s sweet soup! The King said if you hid the card and he won, he’d reward you with a bowl. That’s why you agreed! It had nothing to do with me!"

"You forced me!" Xiao Hei grew agitated, his voice rising. "You even said if I didn't hide it, you’d tell the Judge that I stole a sesame cake from the Underworld pantry!"

"You stole a sesame cake?" The Judge’s eyes lit up at the mention of theft, his three pairs of reading glasses sliding to the tip of his nose, ignored. "Underworld sesame cakes are rationed by head count. Whose did you steal? I must record this—ten copies of the *Underworld Dietary Regulations* for you!"

Xiao Hei panicked, waving his hands frantically. "I didn't steal anything! I was just talking nonsense! Xiao Bai, quit your babbling!"

"Who’s babbling?" Xiao Bai stuck his chin out. "After you hid that Big King, half a sesame cake crumb fell out of your hat. I saw it with my own eyes!"

The two went back and forth, bickering like a pair of ruffled roosters, drawing laughter from the surrounding ghosts. Old Zhou leaned over to Wang Er-Ma and whispered, "Master Ma, their arguing is just like when I fought Old Zhang for the betting chips—no end in sight."

Little Li pulled out his yellow paper ledger, his pen flying. Before long, he recited: "Xiao Hei and Xiao Bai argue and shout, shifting the blame all about. Hiding cards and stealing cake crumbs, a mess that surely brings the drums!" He held up the ledger for them to see, infuriating Xiao Hei, who reached out to snatch it.

Wang Er-Ma intervened. "Enough! We’re looking for the Supreme Straight, not digging up old grudges! Xiao Hei, tell the truth—did you see that card this morning? Or did you see anyone else take it?"

Xiao Hei finally calmed down, scratching his head in thought. "This morning, Xiao Bai and I were delivering the card manual to the King. Passing the kitchen door, I saw A-Xiang squatting on the ground picking something up—it looked like a stiff piece of paper. I didn't think much of it; I thought it was just a vegetable leaf she’d dropped..."

"A-Xiang?" Wang Er-Ma turned to Meng Po. "Sister Meng, when you saw A-Xiang this morning, what was she doing?"

Meng Po, who had been watching the spectacle with her unfinished bowl of sweet soup, blinked. "I passed the kitchen this morning and saw A-Xiang throw something into her big iron pot. It was black and hard. I asked her what it was, and she said it was just a vegetable leaf that fell in. I didn't ask further..."

"A vegetable leaf?" The Judge frowned. "The Supreme Straight is made of heavy cardboard and printed with the pattern of the Other Shore Flower. It’s nothing like a vegetable leaf! Could A-Xiang have mistaken the card for a leaf and thrown it into the pot?"

"That can't be right," Old Zhou waved his hands. "Vegetable leaves are soft, and cards are hard. A-Xiang cooks every day; surely she can tell the difference?"

"Not necessarily," Xiao Bai chimed in. "Last time, A-Xiang mistook Underworld cabbage for a card and threw it down, shouting, 'I play a 3-7 straight!' She ended up throwing a cabbage leaf, and the opponents were laughing so hard they couldn't breathe!"

At this, everyone froze. A-Xiang often referred to her cards as "dish names," and if she had indeed made that mistake before, it was entirely possible she had tossed the Supreme Straight into the pot.

Wang Er-Ma slapped his thigh. "Let’s go! To the kitchen! If it’s in the pot, we’d better hope it hasn't turned to mush, or we won't be able to play the semi-finals!"

Xiao Hei and Xiao Bai stopped bickering and raced toward the kitchen. As they ran, Xiao Hei kept patting his hat, muttering, "Good thing I didn't hide any cards this time, or I’d be scrubbing them for another six months..."

Xiao Bai chuckled, "If you hide cards again, I’ll tell the Queen of Yama and get you a year of scrubbing!"

Xiao Hei glared at him but didn't speak, picking up his pace—he certainly didn't want another punishment. Scrubbing cards was even more exhausting than sweeping the Naihe Bridge, especially with four decks; his hands still ached from last time.

Old Zhou followed behind, clutching his blue cloth bag, mumbling, "Don't let it be mushy. If it is, the Judge will definitely make us all scrub cards for half a year, and I really don't want to..."

Little Li scribbled in his ledger as he ran: "Xiao Hei’s past exposed, Xiao Bai needles him to death. A-Xiang might have tossed the wrong thing, a kitchen search to solve the quest!" He tucked the ledger away and hurried to keep up—he wanted to see if the Supreme Straight had truly been cooked as a vegetable leaf. If so, it would be the most ridiculous incident in the history of Underworld card games!